Good Listening Skills

GOOD LISTENING SKILLS

YOU ARE NOT LISTENING TO ME WHEN…….

 You do not care about me.
 You say you understand before you know my issue well enough.
 You have an answer for my problem before I’ve finished telling you what
  my problem is.
 You cut me off before I’ve finished speaking.
 You finish my sentences for me.
 You find me boring and don’t tell me in a kind and gentle way.
 You feel critical of my vocabulary, grammar, or accent.
 You are dying to tell me something.
 You tell me about your experience making mine seem unimportant.
 You are thinking about what you are going to say rather than listening to me.
 You are communicating to someone else who is present while I am talking
  to you.
 You are whispering in my presence while I am trying to tell you something.
 You are running your own agenda in your head while I am talking.
 You refuse my thanks by saying you haven’t really done anything.

YOU ARE LISTENING TO ME WHEN…….

 You come quietly in to my private world and let me be me.
 You really try to understand me even if I’m not making much sense.
 You grasp my point of view even when it’s against your own sincere convictions.
 You allow me the dignity of making my own decisions even though you think they 
  might be wrong.
 You do not take my problem from me or fix it for me, but allow me to deal with it in
  my own way and learn my own lessons.
 You hold back your desire to give me good advice.
 You look me in the eye when I am talking.
 You repeat back to me what you understood me to say when necessary instead
  of making assumptions about what I might mean.
 You do not offer me religious solace when you sense I am not ready for it.
 You give me enough room to discover for myself what is really going on.
 You accept my gift of gratitude by telling me how good it makes you feels to know
  you have been helpful.
 
 

 

 

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